(no subject)

Right now, I would be getting into Bethy headspace for the usual tuesday night Memento session, and my brain keeps trying, despite me reminding it that I don't have Memento anymore.

Yeah, it's my turn to gush. I am going to miss that game *so* damn much. It is easily, without a doubt 100% the pinnacle of my gaming experience so far. I have never played a game I enjoyed so much for *any* reason. It had the best RP, the best laid out and researched world, the best narrative, the best mix of cinematic play and rules-ing, the coolest characters and NPCs . . . the best game I ever played. For serious, yo. I don't think I will ever find that chemistry again.

I'm going to miss you all way, way too much: Rowan, Wess, Nicholas, Hallister, and of course, Bethy.

*laments*

Moon

I woke myself up last night by talking in my sleep. I was dreaming about being at Lothlorien in the winter, during a festival and talking with my dad; about what, I don't remember, and then wandered away, up the gravel road where it dissapears into the dark trees. It was . . . disquieting. I've been doing that walk alone since I was seven or eight, and it is always creepy, even more so in dreams. No noise but the creak of dead and dying branches and the susserations of dried leaves, and sometime scuffling things in the underbrush. Even under a cloudy sky, the road is white enough that you can see it, even if sometimes only by not looking directly at it-- and when the stars are out, or the moon, it glows bright enough that it lights up the trees around it. Through them, far off, I can see my old house, shining like bone in the light. I feel hunted, so I decide to leave, and I kick my heel against the ground, turning up towards the purple and white sky behind me as I float up off the ground, arms wide, towards the face of a suddenly terrifying moon. I try to speak it's name, but the effort of getting that moaning syllable out makes me work my waking throat, and instead of lifting into the sky, I lift back into my body, the transition tingling like carbonation. I'm left staring at the ceiling, a sleepy and curious Anya looking at me with pricked ears.

I am glad for the warning. Today had a similar feel haunting me all day, nipping at my mind. Inverted communication and disquiet. I decided not to give in, and do something about it, so I have been forceably cheerful all day, and it has worked. Around me, however, I witnessed people fighting *everywhere* . . . on the phone, in tha halls, in their cars. It was surreal. Boyfriends crying over girlfreidns, girlfriends nagging boyfriends, husbands chastising wives and wives screaming at strangers.

I bought raspberries instead. I suppose that's a less offensive way of flipping off the universe.

Creativity keeps knocking on my window panes. I should make use of that.

EDIT: Fixed the links. Whoops!

( Some more art reccomendations )