chantico

I got my ass kicked by work today. Hope the results are worth it. So many little watercolored rocks. So many. And my time outside of the brush was unfocused and generally unproductive in any way. Feeling pretty stymied in a lot of ways. Can't work on Light, waiting on a couple of other projects to give me the go ahead. UGGGGHHH WAITINGGGGG. I hate liminal states. Hate them!

Did *finally* get to listen to the Pacific Rim score. I tend to rate scores and movies separately, though a good score can way elevate a film for me, and a bad one sink it, but a great score can't save a shit film, only give it a nudge. Anyway, quite happy to find Pacific Rim's score to be one of the best I've heard in years, full of bombast and callbacks to old Kaiju films and thunder without being overwhelming or derivative. No Hans Zimmer effect here-- this is clearly a soundtrack for THIS movie, bespoke in all aspects. I am planning on using it as my playlist for Zombies, Run! when I get that set up.

Made up a word today because I could not think of any equivalent: obular. What does it mean? Any guesses? I like it.

My eyes are having a hard time focusing. Thinking tonight will be an evening of things that don't require staring at anything too close to my face.

I have got to stop updating at the end of my work day; by this point the cotton in my head has collected into drifts and for all the conversations and connections I want to have (with any readers, or with the future self that will be reading this one nostalgic day-- hi, self!), there ain't no deep talk happening. I never knew one could feel mental exhaustion, in a very real, physical sense. Always associated it before with that wall you hit where you just don't want to do anything anymore. Alas, no, there is a beyond, and in that realm you will find mist and bellybutton lint and all manner of soft, smothering things to press on the walls of your skull, compacting your eyes, forehead, sinuses.

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Imbolc party on Sunday. Haven't thrown a party in years. Wondering how I'm going to get the house clean, if I should do a little ritual, what I can use as cushions for the lawn furniture since ours did not survive the cold or my many winters of neglect. Seriously though, the whole back romo is a filthy junk pile and I really, really need to get it picked up if people are going to head to the back yard but I am not sure when I am going to be able to do that. Saturday is Moon's birthday party and I miss her so, yeah, not skipping that. Jason's sick and I can't rely on him to clean it up anyway. He wants to find a way to pick up the Superbowl this Sunday during the party and I'm all "Uh. You . . . totally okayed this party thing and the date for it. Please don't sabotage." Or I'm saying that internally. Slinking away from any conversations that might be unpleasant right now because he's worn so thin by work.

MARRIAGE. The careful balancing act of "We need to communicate!" and "I'm too crazy not to take this shit personally right now!"

Thhhbbt.

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Finished The Map's geographical features. placing and naming cities now. Very pleasant and mindless. Painting preparations for Light are coming along-- figured out exactly what region I'm illustrating, did two environmental studies and found a source for one more, picked some grasses to examine, designed the lantern and costume, studied the hard parts of that (though I need to do a texture examination of firelight on wool). Still need to do some studies of the tree, a couple of lantern light, and a *lot* of anatomical work. Then thumbnails at last!

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Gym visit #4 tonight. Overworked my legs yesterday. 24 hours afterward and they still feel weak-- a bad sign. Abs, hips, shoulders tonight, and maybe the treadmill instead of the arc machine to keep my thighs from dying.

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Today's music: The Stroke's "Room on Fire" (meh); Dry the River's "Shallow Bed" (solid, enjoyable folk with some great hooks and lyrics); Run DMC's "Tougher than Leather" (I remember the early 90's!); Krewella's "Wet" (party pop dubstep, entertaining, but in smaller doses than a whole album in one go) and a smidge of Joe Cocker.

Not as productive a Sunday as last week, but I spent finished one picture, finished a drawing for another that I'm rather proud of, went through my closet and picked away at a few other things. It is always a pretty good day when I can try on a bunch of clothes that do not fit anymore, and be okay with that. Goodwill shall be getting a small windfall, and hopefully I will be getting some new fitted trousers soon. I had a lot of fun parading around my studio, putting together outfits for the next two weeks. I have some nice new pieces to try out, and managed one outfit that I think looks fabulous out of a lot of clothing that is otherwise dumpy.

Otherwise, I just spent a lot of time going through some of my new music, of which there is a lot. Impressions!

The Fray, "The Fray"-- Well put together album, mostly inoffensive alt rock. Nothing special in the lyrics department, but the singer can border on emotionally nasal without being whiny. The real standout is "You Found Me", a "religious" song that manages not to be preachy or overbearing. Nothing as good as "How to Save a Life", though.

Lady Gaga, "The Fame"-- Jesus, this girl really does know what she's doing. This stuff is like the distilled essence of late-aughts pop. It sounds grotesque, and it *is*, but in such a crystallized, potent way that you get the satire and end up enjoying that rote beats anyway. "Just Dance" is really good, of course, but also I like "Beautiful, Dity, Rich", for sheer 'oh god this is masochistically awesome'.

Muse, "Absolution"-- I want to listen to this one a little more closely, because I wasn't paying attention enough to the lyrics to give them a thumbs up or down, but I'm at least intruiged. The music is suitably epic emo.

I have a lot more to go through in the next couple of days: Weezer's "Ratitude", Chris Whitley and Jeff Lang collaborating on "Dislocation Blues" (I am very excited for this one, because Chris Whitley just rocks my socks and I love me some good blues. What an underappreciated musician), Kings of Leon "Only By The Night", the Noisettes' "Wild Young Hearts", another Muse album "Black Holes and Revelations", the Yeah Yeah Yeah's "It's Blitz", and the Smashing Pumpkins Best Of album. Plus, some singles. Whew!

Have some more music.

( Liza Soundtrack # 2, Disc Two )