Monkeywrench

[chantico]

I will probably appear more frequently on LJ over the next few weeks, as it's one of the few places I am allowing myself to putter on the internet (and I feel bad for never updating-- not for other people, but I've always rather liked keeping my LiveJournal for my own memory recording purposes). My time spent on the interneet has passed from recreational into detrimental-- I don't just procrastinate, I lose hours to the great devouring black hole that is the world wide web.

It would be different if what I was finding was useful, inspirational or at all increased my happiness, knowledge, or well being. Unfortunately, the only things I'm seeing-- actively seeking out, even-- are the latest statisics on how much the world sucks. Oh, unjust rape cases, infuriating racist assholes, cruel examples of human malice. I don't know why I crave exampes of you so, but I am done. I have been caught in an outrage loop for monthes now, addicted to bad news and helpless rage-- so, I'm severing it, cold turkey. No Jezebel.com, no sf_drama, no Fox News, no checking the livejournals of people I hate, just to get me angry. My internet time is limited to work, LJ, email, and art.

Art is, in fact, the only thing I am allowing myself to actively explore the net for. Any kind of art will do, and any resource for it-- as long as it feeds my desire to LEAVE the computer and go do something creative, instead of sit and seethe (and then let that anger color the way I think of people outside the confines of the computer screen. It just ain't healthy to wonder if the guy across from me on the bus is A Bad Person, and what punishment he probably deserves).

So, LJland. Hello. I hope you have not spawned too many Llamas lately.

See you soon.

Comments

[beckyh2112.livejournal.com]

Hmm. While duende is certainly a viable method of inspiration, from what you're saying, you weren't actually getting inspired by all of those negative emotions.

*ponders interesting art-things* Stretch your wings with a different medium? Mimic a style like Art Nouveau? I'm sadly lacking in resources that might be useful as I'm still poking at learning the basics.

[tooth-and-claw.livejournal.com]

It's not so much duende that I'm struggling with, because that implies a passion that burns hot and *clean*, a cheekiness, and a morbidity that these things don't inspire in me. All that I get is anger-- rotten, spiteful, and poisoned anger, that just sits and festers.

Thankfully, I do find myself easily inspired by visiting online galleries and the like. The key is coming anywhere near the computer and not immediately visiting sites that I know will upset me, simply becasue, i don't know, I get an adrenaline rush from it.

[beckyh2112.livejournal.com]

*nods* That's a good definition of the difference between duende and rage. Mind if I borrow it in the future?

Sometimes people like being angry. Or they like being hurt - I know I have a certain liking for getting outraged and disgusted over the weirder kinds of crap people write sometimes. Trainwreck Syndrome and all that.

Hmmm. Random potentially-inspiring DA pieces?
- 1 (http://lolita-art.deviantart.com/art/Art-Nouveau-IV-59051396) 2 (http://fredy3d.deviantart.com/art/When-Worlds-Collide-104404221) 3 (http://jackieocean.deviantart.com/art/Art-Nouveau-Gambit-43100656) 4 (http://ladena.deviantart.com/art/to-Fairy-Tale-2-104346711) 5 (http://meowgli.deviantart.com/art/Rocky-Sunset-89934426) 6 (http://northernbanshee.deviantart.com/art/Ruby-and-Jade-101307803) 7 (http://jollyjack.deviantart.com/art/How-To-Play-TIE-Fighter-96698217) 8 (http://liek.deviantart.com/art/Steampunk-102006641) 9 (http://mechanicalwhisp.deviantart.com/art/Inner-Beauty-74793668) 10 (http://galeart.deviantart.com/art/Clone-Wars-Clone-Commander-61494283) 11 (http://animal-e.deviantart.com/art/Sun-on-ice-92547473) 12 (http://stinkytofu.deviantart.com/art/Fantasy-94324434) 13 (http://tracyjb.deviantart.com/art/Lackadaisy-Voodoo-41428198) 14 (http://kevindalton.deviantart.com/art/womenz-56553994) 15 (http://sirielle.deviantart.com/art/Let-the-havens-burn-78375387) 16 (http://amusdey.deviantart.com/art/the-duel-99477905) 17 (http://janedean.deviantart.com/art/Steampunk-fridge-magnets-103715294) 18 (http://larbesta.deviantart.com/art/after-summer-fall-shall-come-92165908) 19 (http://scottb.deviantart.com/art/Spray-104008969) 20 (http://risachantag.deviantart.com/art/Photography-Spring-water-103000643) 21 (http://varges.deviantart.com/art/The-4-Elements-Wind-71345463) 22 (http://belial28.deviantart.com/art/Sphynx-2008-103364244) 23 (http://bw-inc.deviantart.com/art/Red-Wolf-63293873) 24 (http://grantgoboom.deviantart.com/art/Star-Wars-Promo-Card-48994321) 25 (http://ruslayer.deviantart.com/art/Vampyre-76614730) 26 (http://eskimoscrybe.deviantart.com/art/Spring-memories-102602831) 27 (http://aksu.deviantart.com/art/Inner-city-102808740) 28 (http://raphael-lacoste.deviantart.com/art/London-Rooftops-82453100) 29 (http://kendre.deviantart.com/art/YUMMY-70793847) 30 (http://marciedip.deviantart.com/art/Dark-Clown-1-33937885)

*stares at list of pictures*

Perhaps I need to collect fewer favorites on DeviantArt, since that's only a random selection from my first five pages. But soooooooo many pretty and fascinating things to look at there.

[tooth-and-claw.livejournal.com]

No, I don't mind you using that at all. Pretty pictures! I have something like 25 pages of favorites, so don't feel bad. You can never have enough.